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MAXWELL. I

July 20th, 1999

Dear Journal,
Tonight is the night.  I will propose to my darling Genevive.  I am so nervous.  What if it's too soon?  We've only been dating for a year; one, very fast year.  Perhaps she isn't ready.  What if she's never ready..?  I have to ask.  Come on, Maxwell, buddy.  You can do it.  Yes, you will do it!  You will do it tonight, no questions asked.

      Wish me luck, journal.
      Maxwell.

July 21st, 1999

      Dear J

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Maxwell's Journal: 1 How can I go on? How can I sit here, shirt sopping wet just as the storm outside, my mind in a haze, and expect that everything is going to be alright? For the bible tells me so? You've torn my heart out, Lord. Torn it out of my chest, and killed it just as you did to my poor Genevive! I need to calm down, but I cannot. I cannot sit here, and calm down. I can't smile. I can't cry anymore. I'm all out of tears for her, for you. Nothing is bringing her back...
So why shall I stay? You don't know this, Lord, but steel can taste so sweet when you're given the strive. The trigger can feel so real when you know it is about to be pulle

Fetishism. With a swift movement of feet, I begin dancing. I can just hear the violin sweeping through me. I can almost feel the strings beneath my fingers as I continue to stride across the rosy tile. My dress stretches in every direction, giggling as I spin around my room. Oh, what I wouldn’t give to be a ballerina. But I would not perform for a human audience, no! Rather, I’d dance for the souls in my trinkets. My typewriters, whom help me with my letters; my bottles of wine, whom keep me in a dream; and my dear sewing machine that dresses me so well; I’ll dance all day long for them, and all evening. Who needs human

Sonnet.I am a lost soul,
and miserably chaste.
I could never play the roll
Of a wife to your taste.
I am proper and odd,
Not to mention I scream
Begging mercy from God;
To release me from bad dreams.
I lay and think, ponder of death,
Though I do not consider such with haste.
I merely ponder, with quivering breath:
When I perish, will my spirit go to waste?
Trust my words, when I call myself a poor bride;
My shell does not portray who I am inside.

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Submitted: December 3, 2012
Image Size: 3.1 MB
Resolution: 2143×3265

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Anxiety.by ~SedulousSara

Traditional Art / Drawings / Other

Not too bad for just using a mechanical pencil.

I've been having a hard time with social anxiety lately. This drawing helped me relieve it a little bit, as well as a bit of blogging.

The blog post is kinda interesting, if you care to read: [link]

I hope you like the drawing.

~DracoFreak899 Dec 12, 2012 Hobbyist General Artist

Done with a mechanical pencil, nice!

~SedulousSara Dec 12, 2012 Hobbyist Traditional Artist

Thanks!! I was quite impressed with it, myself. ^^

~DracoFreak899 Dec 13, 2012 Hobbyist General Artist

until you draw something even better ahaha XD I find I'm that way...

~SedulousSara Dec 13, 2012 Hobbyist Traditional Artist

Yes, precisely.

I am always holding pride in at least one piece of my work, though, so I'm never discouraged. ^^

~DracoFreak899 Dec 13, 2012 Hobbyist General Artist

I find I only like one of my works at a time for very long. I guess the feeling just fades until your like, I need to make something better or different.

~SedulousSara Dec 15, 2012 Hobbyist Traditional Artist

Ah, I kinda wish I worked like that. I'd be inspired to draw more often.
I hold deep pride in a drawing until the moment I think of the idea for a better one.

~DracoFreak899 Dec 15, 2012 Hobbyist General Artist

oh really? I start to lose my pride in a work pretty fast. one day I hope to create the one artwork that lasts in my memory and I never lose pride in.

~SedulousSara Dec 15, 2012 Hobbyist Traditional Artist

I've realized that the more emotion I put in a drawing, the more I grow to love it. Especially if they tell personal stories.

(1 Reply)

~mykindofviolence Dec 5, 2012 Hobbyist Photographer

really good drawing.

~SedulousSara Dec 8, 2012 Hobbyist Traditional Artist

Thank you very much!

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